I often check new wrestlers in my area and several months ago, Coloradoboy showed ups as a transplant to Penn State. I sent him a message, stating if he was into older guys I’d be interested in hosting a match. He asked that I give him time to get settled in, but to be honest not many 23 year olds are interested in 60+ year olds. So I wasn’t optimistic I’d hear back. Low and behold he sends me two dates he was available to travel and both worked for me, but the second one was chosen. The several weeks of ongoing banter with Coloradoboy, would rival any WWE story line. Not often does a 23 year old want to wrestle this 61 year old. He is quite the character with a very WILD imagination. We must have exchanged over 350 messages. I professed to be the “Champ” and he said he was the “ALPHA JOCK” that would turn the EX CHAMP into a “Chump” and that I was a washed up old grandpa. Who he would humiliate, after racking me over his shoulders, while doing squats and become CHAMP himself. We agreed to some rather humiliating stakes the loser would have to go through.(So I knew damn well I didn’t want to lose). The stakes were put on paper which we each signed our names too and were to check off when completed.
There was to be three sessions, first a POWER contest on the mats, which consisted of either escaping or tapping to various non-contested to be put in holds.
Full Nelson power out or tap on mats
Front over arms bear hug power out or tap
Rear over arms bear hug power out or tap
Longest pec bounce with most movement
Double Pec claw, longest time sustained in hold or until tap
Body Scissor over chest on mats , power out or tap
One arm Head lock on mats against chest power out or tap
Cradle hold power out or tap on mat
Push-ups on mats, most in one set without stopping on mats
Left arm wrestle to pin on table
Right arm wrestle to pin on table
The two other sessions were to be “HELL IN A CELL”, (my bedroom) Session two won by the first to get 10 clean submissions, then session three was to be the first to get 20 NHB submissions. I warned him upfront to “expect it when he least expected it” and I was the dirtiest player in the game WHOOOOOOO!
I was feeling bad on the Monday prior to the match and suggest we find a later date. He upped his SHIT TALK and said I was afraid of him. I then let him know, boy it’s on no matter what now! Not sure if it was what I drank, celebrating my 61st birthday on Friday my cold/cough or the excitement of the upcoming match, but I slept but an hour Friday night. Alarm went off at five and I got up, made breakfast, wearily went to the gym. Got groceries and then got ready to go to a car service appointment. Meanwhile I noticed that my opponent who had changed his name to COCKJOCKCOLARADO, because he liked that I called him “COCKY JOCK”. Meetfighter’s profile was suspended. WTF!!!!!! All this banter and now the little shit is just going to disappear! I was both bummed and pissed! I had given him my house address and cell number but I had no other means to contact him. While at my car appointment, I got a text from an unknown number asking if this was Hal from MF and I said yes, he said it was Jamie(Cocky Jock) and told me his profile was temporary suspended because he had the word cock in it. I asked if we were on for Sunday and he said 100% Whew!!!!!! He now is reinstated and is Jockcolarado.
Along with my car service appointment I had other errands to run on Saturday and was hoping to get a nap in before attending a 100 lap dirt track racing in the evening. I laid down, but again didn’t sleep and was feeling like a zombie! Took a shower and left for to the 100 lapper around 4:00. The race ran late and it was 1:00AM until I got home. Again I could not sleep at all. I thought my cold was getting better, but Sunday it seemed worse and my head was throbbing! I dug out the Tylenol! I figured at 100% I was going to have my hands full with Jamie if he could back up his shit talk at all and I was nowhere near 100% now with basically no sleep for two days. I got up at 7:00 made breakfast, made a quick visit to the gym and got more cold meds at CVS before heading to church. I was hoping a little JESUS FIX would do me good. At the very least calm my nerves and get my thoughts on something else other than getting my ass kicked! Jamie texted me on my way to church in Waynesboro that he was leaving State College and would need to change into his gear when he got there. I wasn’t sure how far his travel was but thought he may get there before I got back home from church.
He did arrive about 20 minutes early and I could tell by his weak grip when we shook hands. I got this boy if don’t die of exhaustion first! He asked where he could change and I said my bedroom, which I led him too. I asked him to get on the sales and he weighed in at 205, so at 5’ 5” he was quite beefy! I waited in the addition. He came out wearing sunglasses tank top and speedos, with his full COCK JOCK attitude, and got in my face talking his shit! Which I quickly remedied with an array of open hand bitch slaps to his chest. We settle down and we did the power contest. Which I had felt I had him set him up to fail on. He did gain a few escape points and I tapped one time too. The boy was strong and had well defined arms and legs After the nonstop holds, I was already feeling pretty much spent, and the push up contest and arm wrestling remained. Yeah remember boy (expect it when you least expect it). I had a plan, and did my push-ups first and only did 35, why bother. It was his turn and I left him get to 34 when I slammed down on top of him and put in him a face lock and back breaker. He loved it and I gave him the point for winning the push-ups anyway, only fair right? The arm wrestling at the dining room table was a stale-mate and I just gave in as I had way may points than him already. Even so, the Power Contest score was 13 to 6 in my favor. He asked to just go right to NHB and forgo the clean subs. Fine with me, don’t F with the dirtiest player in the game boy! I even left him start out on top of me laying prone on the bed, The NHB part ended up being TWENTY to zip my favor after about two hours of all-out war. I didn’t make him do all the stakes, but I did give him a hell of a bare ass paddling using a kitchen tool with holes in it until his ass was bright red. Hey it was a stake he asked for! (learn to respect your elders son!) I hope Jamie had a blast, I know I did, but I would have enjoyed it even more if I wasn’t sick and was well rested. We hung out in the addition after that and watch football. My chest and arms are sore as hell today and I know he has to be also as I was freaking merciless beating on him.
No doubt someday I will become a washed up old grandpa. That is humiliated by a young Alpha jock, yesterday wasn’t the day! Perhaps he should change his name again to Jobber Colorado! Wish I had taken more pictures.
We lost one of the all-time greats today. Bobby "The Brain" Heenan was the best because he could do EVERYTHING: a manager and part-time wrestler you hated as a kid but revered as an adult. A color commentator who provided a wealth of ring knowledge and an unmatched sense of humor with impeccable timing. He was a major voice of the sport (and shows) we have loved for eternity. It seemed his talents were endless. He was tailor-made for pro wrestling.
I met him on August 8, 1997 (a day I will never forget). I had the chance to tell him I had been a fan of his since my childhood. He was a big part of our local pro wrestling in the 60's and 70's (he got his start right here in Indianapolis). He was gracious and very funny. I have a photo of the two of us. That is one of my absolute favorites. He gave me and my soon-to-be sparring partner WCW Nitro caps. After that first meeting, we saw him in-person every time he came to Indy. We even saw him in Cincinnati on the night Rick Rude surprised everyone (he had appeared on a WWF show the night before). Every encounter was amazing. I could not believe that I actually knew Bobby Heenan.
Take a look at his work. You will smile (probably laugh, too). He made our favorite sport so entertaining.
I like to test my abs in different ways.
At about 11:15 in, check out the intense roundhouse lefts delivered into the losing guy's midsection.
I don't understand why people don't show up for matches. Then go silent. I experienced this twice this past week. I just don't understand. I feel we should be able to call out game player's. I know it goes against the rules.
I'm sitting on the train, staring out at the countryside and see black and brown cows with beautiful coats full of white spots. The train is speeding through the Belgian countryside taking me home, home after a long week swallowed by work and swallowed by a wrestling contest that will no doubt stay in my memories for quite some time. I've taken to the habit of writing blogs about my encounters and for some time I questioned whether this one shouldn't be kept to myself, a little present just to myself that you keep locked in a safe spot underneath a bed, or inside an old jewellery box. I imagine it a rich red mahogany with some stencilled symbol on it.. maybe with a Celtic or an African symbol owing to my roots, in light green to contrast with the material. What beautiful water-ringed countryside Belgium has, with cute little white stone houses, with black accents around the windows and a red terra-cotta roof.
I've just been wrestling in a city in the north east of the country…Belgium, despite being a small country, has immensely complicated tapestries of language and ethnic tensions which they seem highly capable of creating complex solutions to overcome. Google the Belgian compromise and you'll quickly understand. None of this, however, is of any interest I know to the reader who is probably far more interested in knowing what happened to kimmetje as he arrived in the city to wrestle this guy somewhere in Belgium.
I must say, we both had an amazing connection online, I think he was one of the first persons I befriended on the website and we had exchanged over 1000 message before we had met, and having been on the website for the better part of a month that highlights just how much communicating was taking place. There was something about the way he opened up that had us hitting it off from the get-go, and not to mention the cybers which usually ended with him finding a way to lock my body and enabling him to claim his victory with variations that certainly had me wanting the real deal.
I knew him to be experienced, and also to be regularly wrestling with some powerhouses of the Belgian MF community so as a newcomer to submission wrestling, I knew it was going to be a challenge from the get-go. Most of the wrestling I have done so far have been with people either with whom I had a weight advantage or at least a stamina and speed advantage. With my adversary that was not going to be the case…
As we’d agreed he was there to greet me at the train station, and the long walk to his home allowed us to get to know each other and to connect our voices to the texts which we had spent so much time delicately writing to each other. I met him and his wonderful partner with whom they share two places on the same floor, it’s quite something to see how fusional the two gents are with one another. But after a lot of pontificating, the time finally came for us to affront each other. We had not established any particular rules and there we were going at it for the first set of what would be three distinct matches with multiple submission rounds in the midst of it.
Singlets first, I donned my favourite singlet whilst lending him my N2N and we went straight for it, but it was very quickly clear that this combat featured a pretty outclassed mixed-race boy who was going to be given a lesson in how to resist and defend himself and a white guy who knew how to take pain, dish it out twice-fold, and relentless in his methods to secure a submission. And submissions there would be, and asides from one (to save at least a bit of honour), all the others would come to me. My memory is already fading, from the underwear gear to nude… it was clear that after that first round we were not intending to cover bodies anymore…
I found him particularly powerful in his ability to lock my legs around his and to force them to spread in such a way that the heels were put under severe pressure forcing multitudes of submissions simply from that pain… and not to mention the other one being the forced folding of the feet which provoked a very similar conclusion. I discovered just how painful a properly applied scissor could be, and was glad to be able to learn how to apply it on the third match just to remind him that I wasn’t a push-over and didn’t intend to leave his place completely submissive! And indeed, when I could get on top of him. To be fair, when it happened, I’d have decent duration on top, finding ways to cause him pain by spreading his legs, and jumping up and down on his chest using the full weight of my body, or locking him in headlocks – but even squeezing full force until sweat would glean from my face just wasn’t enough to submit it…. So, I certainly did my best to ditch out some pain as well – if there was one thing which I learned from this match it was certainly to dish that out and be able to resist it better – future adversaries beware.
You might have noticed, when I write blogs, I will have a tendency to leave out the sexual details, both out of respect for my adversary but also due to my discomfort writing them so plainly. But this match, these matches, were quite an experience on that front as well. I also made an unfortunately discovery with the camel clutch, or having holds involving my bare-naked ass in the air and sporting a huge hard-on whilst being contorted in ways I didn’t know my body could handle… and being forced to endure deep face fucks from a guy who certainly wasn’t in anyway lacking in terms of the family jewels… 69’s... mixed with more pain… this match had an intensity that I don’t recall any of my other matches having – perhaps also because I was facing someone so extremely experienced and diverse in the holds he could apply.
I feel better prepared, prepared for my next matches and equipped with new holds that my last defeats have taught me. I just hope I don’t forget them when the next match comes ringing!
We had 12 people (I think) on the matt tonight working on Wrestling, Grappling, Kick Boxing ... it was hard to find space to find places to do things at times. =)
Cerco chubby o robusti per lotta nudi
Sorry this post is a few days late...
If you read my previous blog post, you will recall how much I was looking forward to practicing with the Philly Spartans this past Sunday. Sadly, on Friday evening, I was riding my bike and wiped out, getting nasty scrapes on my right elbow and knee (and even on my belly, where I skidded across the pavement). I got right back up, back on the bike and finished the errands I was running... but holy **** did it hurt when I got home and applied alcohol to those scrapes! In addition to the cuts and abrasions, I also jarred the heck out of my right shoulder.
Come Sunday, I felt a bit better, but the wound on my elbow still couldn't take much pressure before the pain became unbearable. I went to practice anyway - determined to participate as much as I could - despite not being anywhere near 100%.... and I was so pissed at myself! Before wiping out, I had been feeling amazing - I <thought> I was ready for the first practice where I wouldn't be nursing some sort of injury or weak joint. Dang it. Lol... nonetheless, I had a good time doing what I could, and spent a fun bit of time acting as the practice dummy for some things my knee and elbow wouldn't let me be the aggressor on (mainly rolls using the legs). Though the turn-out was low this time, it was still a good practice.
Cut to last night, shoulder still stiff and sore but better.... scrapes mostly scabbed over and healing... and what do I do? Wipe out again, of course! This time I managed to go head-first over the handlebars (yay helmets) and roll onto the ground. I skidded a bit, but was saved by a singlet worn under my clothes and escaped with just a minor scrape... but once again jarred my shoulder. Not as bad - today it's already feeling better than it did before the 2nd fall yesterday - but what the heck, right? Lol... still, not planning to slow down. I take some comfort from having taken the second fall better than the first.
Now, next month the club will be hosting the Annual Philly Spartans Tournament!.... and I plan to train hard all month... then take it easy for the week prior to avoid ANY chance of being at less than 100% for the tournament. Though it looks to be very informal, this will be my first actual competition (like, with weigh-in's and a ref) since starting to wrestle in January. So I am super excited, if pretty confident in being destined to lose. Either way, as with practice, as long as I put up a decent fight and learn something, I'll be happy.
So, to my regular opponents, rest assured that I am assuredly resting and plan to be back in action within a week or two, as soon as these cuts and scrapes are well enough on the mend to bear weight and pressure while wrestling. And to anyone in the region, if you want to compete, to test yourself... check out the tournament next month!
This is one of my biggest pet peeves: guys leaving me hanging! I have been left hanging quite a bit lately! Some guys seem interested in a match, and then they don't talk to me for months on end. There was one guy from another website (Global Fight) from the UK. He strung me along for months. I sent him several messages over the course of that time. He never replied until one day, and in that reply he essentially told me to Fuck Off! I've also had guys block me for no reason or notice.
1. If you have a problem with me, take it up with me, don't just block me without notice or a reason. Let's talk about it!
2. Don't string me along for months pretending to be interested and don't contact me. I know stuff happens, but even a little not is appreciated!